


Before You Know It

by Play_loud



Category: Rizzoli & Isles
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:55:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23286649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Play_loud/pseuds/Play_loud
Summary: Jane is beginning to realize she has feelings for her best friend, but will a devastating event end things just as they're getting started?
Relationships: Maura Isles & Jane Rizzoli, Maura Isles/Jane Rizzoli
Comments: 6
Kudos: 44





	1. Chapter 1

Jane walked down the hallway to the morgue, slowing her normally quick strides as she approached. Stopping just before the windows, she peeked in. Maura was inspecting the victim that lay on her table, her back to the detective. Taking the opportunity, Jane took quick, yet carefully quiet, steps towards the doorway, not entering yet. Instead, she poked just enough of her head in to allow her to see the doctor.

She wasn’t quite sure when it had started, sneaking glances at Maura before entering the morgue. But each time she made the trip, she’d first spend a moment watching her. When she first noticed it, that she was, for lack of a better term, checking out her best friend, she’d tried to shake it off. She’d long since given up though, succumbing to the other woman’s beauty. Today, Maura wore a perfectly tailored button-down and skirt, sporting her typical heels. As much as she made fun of them, the detective had to admit heels did wonders for showing off the elegant strength of the other woman’s legs. She followed the muscular curve of her calves, slowly up to the doctor’s-

“Detective Rizzoli?” Jane straightened her posture, leaning against the door frame to look as nonchalant as possible. She directed her gaze in the direction of the voice that had disrupted her thoughts, landing on Susie Chang, who was sporting a perplexed expression.

“Oh, hey Susie. I was just coming down to see how the autopsy was coming along. Didn’t want to interrupt M- ugh.” She shook her head and walked away, stepping into the morgue. “Hey Maur, how’s it going?”

The doctor hardly looked up from her work, merely casting her eyes in the direction of her friend. “Hello, Jane. There are no obvious signs of trauma, so we’re running some tests to try to determine the cause of death.” Jane nodded quietly, leaning against a nearby wall. Her gaze stayed on Maura, train of thought returning to those damn legs. Having received no response, Maura once again directed her eyes towards Jane. Seeing that the detective seemed to be looking at her, she straightened up, turning her body towards her friend with a raised eyebrow. Jane let her eyes travel up from thigh, to the perfect curve from hip to waist. From waist to chest, chest to neck, neck to eyes that were staring right at her - oh. She coughed and ran her hands through her hair.

“So, it’s Friday.” She allowed her eyes to travel throughout the room, anywhere but back on Maura. Despite her best attempts to ignore it, heat spread up her neck and across her face. Caught once again.

“Yes, it is.” She shouldn’t have expected Maura to facilitate such an abrupt change in conversation and atmosphere, but it had been worth a shot.

“Well, I managed to get the weekend off, figured you might want some pizza and a movie tonight?” The flush slowly drained from her face, and she returned her gaze to the woman in front of her. A smile spread across Maura’s face at the suggestion of dinner and a movie. That perfect smile, perfect dimple, and those perfect eyes brought the heat straight back to Jane’s face.

“I would love that, Jane. That sounds like a fantastic evening. In fact, I have the perfect film!” She turned on her heels, returning to the body on the table. Jane just watched as the woman in front of her worked, so adept that she could carry on a conversation as she did so. Bent over the victim, she rambled about the film she’d chosen for the evening. Jane heard hardly any of it, so entranced watching her work. This was something she did often, come down to the morgue to watch Maura work. If asked, she’d say it was to observe the autopsy, that being there helped her solve the crimes. That had been the truth, at first. But lately, she’d been enjoying seeing the focused, resolved look on Maura’s face as she searched for any clue, any tiny shred of evidence.

“How does that sound?” Hazel eyes were back on hers, waiting for an answer, once again pulling the detective from her thoughts.

“That sounds great Maur, I’ll pick up the pizza on my way over. Listen, I’m going to head back upstairs, let me know if you find anything?” The doctor simply smiled and nodded in response. Heading back upstairs, Jane shook her head in a failed attempt to clear it. It was one thing to be attracted to your best friend, but she’d allowed this to get out of her control. How many times had she just been caught outright staring at Maura? Taking time out of the workday to aimlessly watch the doctor was bad enough, but she’d allowed herself to get so lost in it that Maura was noticing. Hell, even Chang was noticing. She’d have to get some self-control. It was unprofessional at best, and at worst could make Maura uncomfortable. The last thing she needed was to strain their relationship over a little crush.

* * *

Out of her peripheral vision, Maura spotted the tall, slim figure she knew was Jane Rizzoli peeking through the window of the morgue. She smiled to herself as the shadow of her friend crept by the windows. There was a pause that she knew to mean the detective was standing by the doorway. This had started a few months ago - Jane would stand by the door to watch Maura work before stepping into the morgue. Just the same as each time before, she could feel the detective’s dark gaze on her.

At first, she’d been a bit confused. She would feel eyes on her and turn around to see the detective peering through the door at her. But after a dozen or so times catching her and watching Jane flush and scramble for a reason for being there, Maura began to understand.

She and Jane had always had a... unique relationship. To Maura, it had always been clear that there was something more than friendship there. There was no denying that Jane was an attractive woman. No, not with the way her curls framed her strong jawbone, or the way her dark eyes could all but pull the air from Maura’s lungs. It went far beyond appearance, though. Her unyielding confidence, the way she commanded every room she walked into, all of these factors came together, perfectly arranged to make the indisputably magnetic woman she knew was standing behind her. The woman who, with one look, could send an undeniable heat surging through her.

So she didn’t mind it, that their relationship seemed to have shifted slightly beyond platonic. In fact, she was frustrated that it hadn’t begun to progress even further.

To Maura, it was obvious that there was an intense mutual attraction. But she knew Jane, and knew that she would need time to figure it out on her own. Any sudden movement could send her running in the opposite direction. No, Jane would come to it on her own. Their pull towards each other was undeniable, Maura knew eventually Jane would see it too.

So for now, she would play oblivious to the way Jane looked at her. She would pretend she didn’t feel the detective’s eyes on her, and try to ignore the heat that followed. She would go at Jane’s pace.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Susie Chang’s voice, “Detective Rizzoli?” She stifled a laugh as she heard Jane mumbling what must have been an excuse for what she was doing. Jane entered the room and they exchanged quick words on the autopsy, though there was not yet much to discuss. There was a silence that followed, and Maura looked up to find the detective staring at her. Jane often checked her out, yes, but this open staring was uncharacteristic. Maura straightened, turning to face the other woman. She followed Jane’s eyes as they traveled up her body, and lifted an eyebrow in puzzled amusement at the flush that took over the detective’s face as their eyes met.

“So, it’s Friday.” It took all she had not to laugh at the blatant attempt to change the subject. She wasn’t about to let Jane off that easy.

“Yes, it is.”

“Well, I managed to get the weekend off, figured you might want some pizza and a movie tonight?” Truly, Maura could think of nothing better. It had been a long week, they had barely had time to spend together outside of short visits in the morgue, or lunch together once or twice. Maura had been itching for some time with Jane, and couldn’t keep the smile off her face at the thought of a night in with her. She launched into a description of the perfect movie for the evening, returning to work on the victim that lay on her table. As often happened when Maura explained things at length, she was met with silence. The silence, however, continued after Maura had stopped talking. Glancing over at Jane, she once again saw the detective looking at her.

“How does that sound?” Jane visibly snapped out of whatever had caused her to lose focus on the current moment. Her eyes traveled to Maura’s briefly before she stood straight up, no longer leaning against the wall for support.

“That sounds great Maur, I’ll pick up the pizza on my way over. Listen, I’m going to head back upstairs, let me know if you find anything?” Maura could see something was troubling her friend, so she gave her a simple smile and nod before turning to her work.

As Jane walked away, Maura turned to watch her go, twisting the ring around her finger. It was her tell, and she knew it, but she couldn’t help but be a little anxious. She could see conflict and anxiety in Jane’s eyes, and had been able to on and off for a few weeks now. As Jane’s best friend, she felt a certain obligation to figure out what was causing such turmoil for her. Of course, she had an idea, but it would be selfish to assume she was the cause of such heavy feelings.

However, the signs she was seeing - sudden decreases in eye contact, longer than normal periods of silence, persistent rubbing of her palms, more pauses, and stuttering when speaking, and abrupt ends in conversations - only seemed to be happening when they were alone together. These were objective observations, she’d been careful to watch for these signs in many different scenarios. So really, she told herself, it wasn’t an assumption. More of a presumption, if anything.

In order to be sure, she’d need to collect more data.


	2. Chapter 2

“The damn pizza guy,” Jane paused, looking between the pizza box in her left hand and case of beer in her right, before kicking Maura’s door shut, launching back into her rant before the door closed behind her, “gave me the wrong pizza. So I had to wait for him to make another one.” She placed the pizza box on the counter, opening a drawer for a bottle opener, effortlessly popping open the nearest beer bottle. Scooping up a slice of pizza, she plopped on the couch. “And then, this lady cuts me off in the parking lot, and  _ she- _ ,” hardly pausing as she took a bite of the pizza, she continued with her mouth full, “has the audacity to get out of her car and yell at  _ me _ ! So much for Christmas spirit.” She placed her beer on the coffee table, reaching for the remote, and was interrupted by Maura handing her a plate and a napkin. Maura simply laughed at the look on Jane’s face, not unlike a puppy in trouble, as she placed her beer on a coaster and wiped the pizza grease off her hands before grabbing the remote. 

“Actually, Jane, the holidays are often a time of stress for people. Forty-four percent of women report being more stressed and irritable during this time of year.” 

“Yeah, well it sucks.” 

“Language.” Despite the hint of admonishment in her voice, Maura was smiling at Jane.

“You didn’t yell at me when I said ‘the damn pizza guy’.”

“I was simply letting you get the frustration out of your system.” Jane huffed, shoving more pizza into her mouth. She tossed the remote to Maura, knowing she was better off letting her pick what they’d watch tonight. Despite how much she complained about having to watch documentaries, she didn’t mind. She enjoyed watching Maura’s eyes light up as she learned something new, and Jane liked to occasionally surprise her with facts she had retained from nights like these. She retrieved them each another slice of pizza while Maura selected the perfect film. Before she could return to the couch, however, Maura had stood up.

“I’ll be right back, I’m going to change.” Jane plopped back onto the couch, stretching across the length of it. She closed her eyes, basking in how damn delicious her pizza was, and how comfortable she felt here. Jane wasn’t shy, she’d had many friends over the years. Never a friendship like this, though, where she could walk in without knocking and immediately make herself at home. Never a friendship where she knew where the bottle opener was, or that there were spare clothes for her in the guest room if she were to ever need them. Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Maura coming down the stairs. 

Holy sh- never a friendship with someone who had legs like  _ that _ . Maura had changed into pajamas - pink satin shorts, and a button-up top. The brunette felt the flush hit her face and tried to hide it by focusing back on the pizza she was eating. 

“Really Maur, shorts? It’s 15 degrees outside.”

“Well I’m not going outside, and it’s quite comfortable in here. I’d be too warm in long pants.” As the other woman walked towards her, Jane had to force herself not to stare. Those legs were her weakness. They were perfect - feminine and smooth, but clearly strong. It must be from all the yoga, or maybe the running, but the powerful muscles were clearly visible. Maura sat on the couch, turning to lay across it just as Jane was positioned. Their legs were touching, and even through her pants, Jane could feel how warm she was. That heat spread through her body to her core, and all she wanted to do was reach out and touch Maura’s legs. She could feel herself flushing again. This was definitely becoming a problem. How often had they watched tv like this without a second thought, but now all she could think about was how close they were, how only one layer of fabric was between them. Every inch of her leg that was touching Maura’s felt like it was on fire. 

She’d been pleasantly surprised when Maura put on a documentary about baseball. It was a good middle ground - something Jane was interested in, but Maura still got to absorb some new information. It wasn’t long before her panic at their close proximity faded. It had been a long week for both of them; she’d decided to allow herself to take this time to decompress, not spend more time worrying. Beer, pizza, baseball, and Maura - the ingredients for a perfect night, she wouldn’t allow herself to ruin it by overthinking the entire time. Though she couldn’t quite shake the heat caused by Maura’s skin against her leg. 

They spent the rest of the night that way, laying across the couch together. A few beers and more than enough pizza in, Jane felt the stress of the week dissipating. More than once she caught herself beginning to drift to sleep. 

She looked across the couch at Maura, who was engrossed in the documentary. Eyes trained on the screen, Maura seemed to be unaware that Jane’s focus had shifted to her. Jane used that to her advantage, allowing herself to spend more than just a fleeting moment watching her. Spending time with her like this - both of their guards down, clearly finding peace in each other’s presence - made Jane think maybe everything would be alright. Maybe confessing her feelings to Maura wouldn’t change anything, maybe she wouldn’t lose her best friend. Better yet, maybe Maura felt the same way. 

The documentary ended and Jane snagged one last slice of pizza before heading home. It was a short drive, but one she drove in total silence. She could almost still feel the heat of Maura’s legs against hers. Through the whole drive home, letting Jo Friday out, and getting ready for bed, Maura never left her mind. For a little while, she lay in bed awake, playing over the events of the night. The carefree feeling of being together, the effortless conversations and laughter, those damn legs. Eventually, she drifted to sleep with the knowledge that she’d dream of her best friend, as she had every night for weeks. 

* * *

Jane was late, which was not a surprise. The extra time gave Maura space to question what she was doing. It was a silly thought, wasn’t it? That the turmoil Jane was experiencing had anything to do with Maura. She wasn’t entitled to share everything with Maura, even if she typically did. Perhaps she was experiencing work-related stress. Really, it could be anything. It was self-centered to believe Maura could be the cause of such intense feelings. 

As unsurprising as it was for Jane to be late, so was her chaotic arrival. Beer in one hand and pizza quite impressively balanced in the other, she’d hardly entered before launching into a story. Their conversation came as naturally to Maura as following her around, resetting things as she undid them. By the time Maura made it to the couch in her wake, Jane was halfway through her pizza. She handed her the plate and napkin anyway, unable to stifle a laugh at the look on Jane’s face. Taking the hint, Jane wiped the pizza grease off her hands and placed her beer on a coaster instead of the bare coffee table. She tossed the remote in Maura’s direction and got up for more pizza while Maura selected the film they’d be watching for the evening. After finding the baseball documentary she’d decided would be a good fit, she went upstairs to change. 

In her quest to determine if she was the cause of Jane’s suddenly apparent sense of turmoil, she’d decided to wear her satin pajama set. She knew it was flattering, but it was not overly suggestive. And although it was frigid outside, inside it was warm enough to make shorts appropriate. Perhaps it would catch Jane’s attention.

Jane’s reaction was instantaneous. Her eyes widened, and just as quickly as she’d looked at her, she looked away. Her face and neck grew flush as she openly stared at her pizza. 

“Really Maur, shorts? It’s 15 degrees outside.”

“Well I’m not going outside, and it’s quite comfortable in here. I’d be too warm in long pants.” Jane was lying lengthwise across the couch, so Maura did the same. This was typical for them, but Maura could see Jane’s respiration increase. It was several minutes before Jane was no longer flushed, her breathing returning to normal. Her reaction was much more apparent than Maura had anticipated, and she worried she had made her uncomfortable. However, it wasn’t as if Jane had never seen her in shorts before, Maura was certain she’d have noticed if it made Jane uncomfortable in the past. She tried to push the worry out of her mind to focus on the objective data - Jane had exhibited a clear physical response to seeing Maura in less clothing than usual. This was good. Well, good that she was gathering reliable information, not necessarily that Jane had reacted that way. Maybe both.

They both turned their focus toward the documentary. Maura had chosen it in hopes that something Jane enjoyed would help to relieve her stress. It seemed to be working, Jane seemed much less tense than she had earlier in the night. 

As the documentary was winding down, out of the corner of her eye, Maura saw Jane shift slightly. She was looking at her, straight at her. At first, she thought maybe Jane was going to speak, but she didn’t. As hard as she tried, she could no longer focus on the documentary. She could hear her heart pounding, and feel Jane’s eyes on her. Should she look back at her? No, no, that might make things uncomfortable. She hardly wanted to move, for fear it would spook Jane, or simply cause her to look elsewhere. Maura couldn’t be sure how long had passed, it must have only been a few seconds, but after what felt like ten minutes, Jane returned her eyes to the screen. 

Suddenly Maura was aware of her own breathing. Had she been holding her breath? It was becoming more frequent that simply feeling Jane’s gaze on her could create such a response. 

The documentary had ended, and Jane was heading home. The brunette snagged a slice of pizza for the road and left, thinking Maura for the night. Maura cleaned up the kitchen and living room, took care of Bass’s evening needs, and headed upstairs for bed. Even after Jane was long gone, Maura couldn’t clear her mind of her. It had been a tame night, not unlike many others they had shared together, but Maura could still feel her dark gaze. Regardless of the reasons Maura ascribed to paying such close attention to Jane’s responses to her, she couldn’t help let her feelings get the best of her. Each time Jane’s eyes lingered on her, or she seemed distracted by her presence, she grew more and more hopeful that they could soon progress beyond friendship. Despite her best efforts to push thoughts of the brunette from her head, she fell asleep to thoughts of Jane there with her.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter! There's more to come soon. Please comment! I'd love to hear honest opinions and critiques.


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